Those who are closest to a sociopath may have trouble recognizing that their loved one is a sociopath.
This is her story:
Those words still ring in my head:
For years, I blamed myself. I loved you with all of my heart. I went out of my way to do things for you to show you I loved you. Sometimes I even did things I believed were morally wrong just because I knew it mattered to you. But no matter what I did, I was regularly faced with that response when I would express my love to you."You have a funny way of showing it."
I hated those words so much, but I didn't know what else to do. I felt I constantly had to prove myself to you.
No matter what I did, it was never enough.
Deep down, I knew it wasn't me. I knew you were cheating. I knew when you picked fights with me, it was so you could have an excuse to leave the house and be with whomever the Flavor of the Week was. I knew it didn't matter what I said or did, you were still going to withhold your love.Were you even capable of real love?
Several months ago, I was looking up the definition of "sociopath." I didn't even have you in my mind at the time; I was looking it up for a totally unrelated issue.
What I read stunned me.
I was married to a sociopath for ten years, and I didn't know!
A compulsive liar, sure.
A cheater, definitely.
A thief, absolutely.
But.. a sociopath? I would never have gone that far describing you.
But there it was. Right there on my computer screen. An answer to all the questions I had asked myself through the years.
My ex-husband is a sociopath.
Thankfully, I no longer have contact with you. I couldn't be happier about that. I know my daughter and I are better without you around.
I do however, still have contact with your kids.
Your son posted a picture of you recently. I can't say I was surprised when I saw that you were wearing a wedding ring. Again. You never could figure out how to be alone.
I wonder about your wife. Who is she? Does she even realize that she's Wife #4? (Or is she #5? You've had enough time to go through another marriage and divorce.) I imagine she would have to have pretty low self-esteem to be with you.
And I wonder. Does she tell you she loves you just to have you respond:"You have a funny way of showing it." 3 Comments