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Sometimes, It Hurts More Than It Should

I’m lonely. I’m really lonely. Yet I’m married, have four amazing kids and a dog. Yet, I am so lonely that it sometimes feels like my chest will explode. I used to have friends.  I used to be the life of the party.  I was always the one that did the crazy stunts or...

You Are Stronger Than That Bastard

I am now 45 years old and I nearly lost my marriage to PTSD. It was my first year of marriage, and I’d gotten a nice degree, so I got a great job at an investment bank. It all started to unravel after the birth of my first child, a boy. Every time I changed his...

I Can’t Heal From This

Three years ago, my husband attempted to rape me. I didn’t really think of it that way at the time. I did shove him off me with a hand to his throat, and he was extremely angry. A few months later, he completed the rape. He’s always been terrible with...

Infertility Is…

As we have traveled (and travailed) through our journey (ha!) with infertility struggles, I’ve learned a lot from the infertility blogs that I’ve read, and from our family and friends. While I do have to put myself on hiatus from infertility blogs on a regular basis,...

Danceband On The Titanic

There is a picture of me, somewhere out there, probably still on my dad’s phone unless they’ve turned into Christmas Card people, in which case, the picture is most definitely out there in the world for all to see. I hope it is not. I didn’t see the...